HUNTING FOR THE NEXT HONEY BOO BOO

Published: April 15, 2013, 12:30 pm, by Bill Vogrin
Alana Thompson, known as Honey Boo Boo, is the star of a reality television show "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" on the TLC network. It follows the 7-year-old Alana, a child beauty pageant contestant, her mother, June Shannon, father, Mike Thompson, and her sisters. It is filmed at their home in rural Georgia.

Alana Thompson, known as Honey Boo Boo, is the star of a reality television show “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” on the TLC network. It follows the 7-year-old Alana, a child beauty pageant contestant, her mother, June Shannon, father, Mike Thompson, and her sisters. It is filmed at their home in rural Georgia.

On any given day I get some odd calls and email.

For example, on Tuesday I got a call from a woman asking me who she could call at the U.S. Olympic Committee to get help fixing her fence. It had been blown down in our windstorm that day.

It took me a minute to realized she had found my June 23, 2010 column in which I wrote that the USOC wanted to “mend fences” with folks in Colorado Springs and be a better neighbor. She hung up quickly after I explained what the expression really meant.

I also get a lot of come-ons from people wanting to make me a millionaire or who want to help me win a Pulitzer Prize for excellence in journalism. (We all know that isn’t going to happen.)

Anyway, that’s why I was skeptical when I read a recent email from Bert Klasey, who identified himself as “development producer” for a television production company called Zodiak USA.

He was looking for ideas for a new reality show.

For some reason, Klasey figured I might have come across the next Honey Boo Boo.

Honey Boo Boo 4.

“I’m rolling out a development initiative here that would, I hope, allow us to get more in touch with different parts of the country in our continued search for new people, businesses and ideas that we could ultimately feature in a television show,” Klasey wrote.

Before I jettisoned his email to the spam folder, I decided to check him out. (Mainly because he was offering some serious cash for successful story pitches.)

So I made a call to a friend in the business. (I really do have an actor/director friend in Hollywood.) Anyway, seems Klasey is legit and produced the Hoarders show on A&E network.

Got me thinking maybe I could scare up a tip or two for him.

Frankly, the newsroom would be a perfect reality show except no one would believe it.

Actor Michael Richards played the character Cosmo Kramer on the NBC sitcom Seinfeld from 1989-98.

Actor Michael Richards played the character Cosmo Kramer on the NBC sitcom Seinfeld from 1989-98.

Who would believe my buddy Bill, who used to sleep in his chair, head cocked straight back and snoring? He even sprawled out a few times under his desk. We took photos to prove it.

Or the editor who came in after midnight and videotaped himself dancing on file cabinets, smoking pot and pretending to use heroin. He spliced it with video he’d taken of a publisher he hated and turned it into a spectacular resignation video.

Or the reporter who was our version of Cosmo Kramer from Seinfeld. He lived in a hotel room for months and then in an RV. He’d drive 1,000 miles on a weekend to find a good taco. One day he called in sick, flew to Chicago to party with his girlfriend, felt guilty and called his editor to confess. And got canned.

Anyway, maybe there is a Honey Boo Boo in our midst. Or someone who might be a great subject for reality TV. Please send me your suggestions.

And no, the USOC does not fix wind-damaged fences.

Honey Boo Boo 3

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